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Another kind of beauty

March 27, 2012

Once I visited my Vietnamese friend in California, I told her about one of my Asian friends who was a nightly girl. Every night she went out to hook up with American guys for sex in nightclubs, she was often the first person among her friends who got a guy. Men always complimented that she was so beautiful. My Vietnamese friend abruptly interrupted by asking me that “is she beautiful in American’s eyes?” I replied “yes” and fully understood what she meant. What was surprised me the most was that I thought that the ‘beautiful in American’s eyes’ was said only in among Thais. However, I have learned from her that Vietnamese also think the same way that American men feel sexual attraction to Asian's facial features in opposition to Asians’. So I believe that I would be able to make a conclusion that most Asians would understand what 'beautiful in American eyes' is.

My Vietnamese friend would be suspicious why I told her about my friend. If you are overweight and you say that it is because you eat all day, this would not be a case to be discussed when the cause creates a result logically. However, if you are super thin (for example, under 100 lbs.) while everyday you eat a lot like a hippo, you would make a controversy.

Asian girls who are beautiful in American’s eyes have a life like Cinderella; they have a miserable life in their Asian countries but having a wonderful life in the opposite site of the world. They can make other beautiful Asians jealous at them with a question that why Americans / Western men often pick a super-ugly Asian girl to win the crown?

Once my friend who was beautiful in American’s eyes told me about her life when she lived in Thai community that she was often teased by other Thais that her face was very ugly; they compared her face to a ‘ghost-like’. Once an Asian man, who worked with her and who had a wife was during pregnancy, teased her that she looked like a ghost. His wife heard and threatened her husband to stop teasing her because she believed in karma that her unborn baby will look like her. Since then her husband never teased her again out loud (but he may still thought in his mind.) Sometime she traveled in Thailand and wanted to have sex with Thai men. However, even she paid money to men, still there was no any man happy to take it.

Beautiful in American’s eyes is opposite from universal beauty (which you can see them from Miss Universe beauty contest.) This type of beauty is composed by exotic Asian's features which are completely opposite to Western's.

One evening I ate out at a Japanese restaurant. A young couple (a young, handsome American man dated an Asian girl, believed she was Chinese) was leaving the restaurant. They walked past my table. Immediately my Asian friend saw her, he gossiped as we thought the same way—“why this handsome American man took this ugly Asian girl to dinner?” Her round face (like chin is cut off) with a pushed-in nose which revealed clearly her two nostrils, resembled a pig.

Asian’s round face is one of the exotic Asian features which is opposite to Western’s. Perhaps Americans may think that round face interprets a cute look and good mood. Everyone wants to be beautiful but I believe that no any Asian girl wants to look like her.

If you do plastic surgery—a chin implant in Asia, Asian doctor will extend your chin longer. Long pointed chin is a popular style in Asia to restructure the round face to look more like Western people. In America, in contrast, American doctor, instead extend a chin longer, will put the implant to the front of a chin to emboss it.

Another exotic Asian feature is narrow eyes. They can be as narrow as having two short horizontal straight lines on the eye positions (or eyes are almost completely closed and tight closed when laugh.) Narrow eyes make Asians look like they are drowsy and sleepy all the time. Moreover, because upper eyelids contain fat, they are swelled like having a bee’s strike; eyelashes, instead of curve up and long like South American girls, are straight down and short because half of their length is hidden underneath the eyelids. Asians who have narrow eyes are often teased among their friends that “open your eyes. Don’t fall sleep.” Some try to force against their natural narrow eyes by open their eyes wider until small wrinkles permanently appear above their eyebrows. Asian women don’t like having narrow eyes. The first thing on their faces which most Asians choose to change if they have a chance to do a plastic surgery is double eyelids to look more like Western and South America women because they believe that Western characters are modern but exotic Asian characters look too tradition.

Second popular plastic surgery for Asian is high nose ridge, in contrast to rhinoplasty for Western people. Long time ago, I knew one Thai woman who had an American boyfriend. She asked her boyfriend to do high nose ridge but her boyfriend said that if she did, he will definitely breakup her. Her boyfriend may have never realized how much would she feel terrible living in Thai community as she fell into the category of beautiful in American’s eyes. At work, she was teased and laughed all the time. Once I heard a man who worked with her said to her that—“your face has nothing good, except your hair” (because she has long silky hair.) However, her boss told me, I was surprised, that often when she came to work, American men walked follow her to the work place. Everyday after work, American men on the subway often made goo-goo eyes to her. Once a man walked follow her to inside her workplace, just to tell her that ‘she was beautiful as the moon’. ‘Beautiful as the moon’?—I was very surprised when I heard his comparison or perhaps he meant a ‘moonless night’? To visualize how she looks, you can imagine to a bulldog that in the middle part of her face shrunk, with a flat nose (if tear sheds out on one eye, without a dam, it can freely flow to flood the other eye) and a pushed-in nose. Yet, you have to combines a bulldog with a Chow-Chow dog which has very small narrow eyes on a round, chinless face. However, another American man used to compliment her in front of everyone who worked with her that in his life, he has never seen any woman as beautiful as her (!!!)

Asian women think thin lips are beautiful but Americans think full lips are hot! When I was little, I was taught that any Asian woman who had full lips was type of woman who if she was married, she would have had two or more husbands who had died (Asian women who have full lips are like being cursed but in the reality, her lips can’t cause her husband to die. Or think in a funny way, people may imagine that big lips can potentially swallow her husbands. However, I don’t think in the depth of their minds, they believe that way—it is a joke to tease someone.)

Americans love to have strong jaw lines but Asian don’t. Some Asian transgenders do plastic surgery to reshape their jaw lines to be smaller (or look disappeared on their faces) because they think that big jaw lines make them look more masculine. Normally, for Thais who look more like Chinese, their jaw lines don’t show because their faces, especially around cheek area, contain fat. However, except people who live in the Northeastern part of Thailand, they are lean and big jaw lines become a feature. When I was little, I often heard a joke said that because people who lived in the Northeastern part of Thailand ate sticky rice and because sticky rice was tougher in chewing than eating white rice which were mainly consumed by people who lived in other parts of the country, sticky rice caused their jaws exercise harder--and that was the cause of having big jaw lines (however, this isn’t true. People who live in different parts of the country or of the world have different features. Having strong jaw lines is considered a good feature for me too.)

Asian wants to have light skin tone but they know that American men are attractive to Asians who have dark tanned skin. Asians who are born with very dark skin tone are teased that-- ‘dark like this, farang (the term farang means Western people) will love you.’ Tanning business would never be popular in Thailand.

Often seen, Americans sit in the sun and read book; Thai kids are taught that sitting in the sun for long period of time can be dehydrate and harm their health, especially reading book in the sun can damage their sights. Anyone who sits in the sun and reads book in Thailand would make people think s/he is insane. Unlike in the cold climate countries, sun shine in the tropical zone is too strong to use in warming body's temperature.

Thais often use the phase ‘Khaw-Meon-Kai-Pok’ to compliment someone who has light skin tone. Khaw means pure white color; Meon means comparison; Kai means egg; Pok mean peeling. You boil an egg, and peel off its shell, then you will see a white boiled egg which is very white—that is a skin color which Asians want to have. I am not sure that if someone has white skin like white boiled egg is still considered a fine-looking skin tone.

Why Thais don’t want to have dark tan skin?

Most Thais who live in rural area work in agriculture. Agriculture is considered a tough job; working under the sun all day and every day can burn their skins (Unlike some young, white Americans have red cheeks, many Thai women who work in agriculture have dark sunburn spots on their both cheeks). Worse yet, they get paid less. Young generations, who have a chance to find other better jobs, would want to leave their farms. Unlike city people who work in offices with air conditions, they get higher wages with doing light works. Their skin tones are lighter than people who always work under the sun. Therefore, dark skin tone implies farmers who work in a hard work, in contrast to light skin tone which implies city people.

Besides human appearances, ‘another kind of beauty’ can be applied to other things else, for instant, sexual fantasies. Normally an in-shape body is considered a perfect body. However, some men are turned on by women who are overweight—this is opposite to what majority of people think in term of beautiful body.

One of my female friends grows long, dark hair around her nipples. I asked her one day—“why don’t you shape them?” She told me that she was inspired this idea by one of her female friends who grew long hair around her nipples. Her friend suggested her that men who dated her really liked licking on them. This is also considered another kind of beauty.

Some men are turned on by women’s odor. They think that the best time to have sex with a woman is when she just finishes her daily exercise—this is opposite to majority of people who love good cologne smell.

Like Americans love exotic Asian features, another kind of beauty can be in vice versa. Long time ago, some of my friends who came to visit me saw a young American man who lived in my neighbor, they often asked me that “do you know that guy, he is so handsome.” And seriously he was very sexually attractive. Every of my friends dreamt of having sex with him. However, he told me that he had a very hard time to find a girlfriend because he wasn’t a good-looking American guy but I thought that he should quit his job and go Hollywood (or move to Asia, he can be a star.) For Americans, his facial feature fell into the category of another kind of beauty.

People who are ‘another kind of beauty’ are considered ugly in their native countries. They are teased and laughed everyday. The tease, sometimes, is as bad as being compared by a phase—‘Ching-Ma-Kurd’. Ching means competition; Ma means dog; Kurd means to be born—the complete translation is-- ‘God is just about to send a dog to be born but someone completes with the dog and badly, s/he wins’. However, don’t be upset because life can be as a star in another country.

Once I went out with an American man, he gossiped that “look at that Asian woman, she is so ugly.” I looked at her and said that “for Asian, she is considered a fine-looking woman.” So if you are teased that you look very ugly, don’t be upset but just explain to people that 'you are not ugly but only you live in a wrong place.'

However, another kind of beauty can be benefit for some. If you look for a woman to marry with but unfortunately you are not considered a handsome American man in America, you would get a perfect match, an unattractive American woman to marry (except, you are a billionaire, who your beautiful wife looks for a luxurious life.) Having sex with an unattractive wife, your sex life would be boring. However, if you look for other alternative choices in the opposite side of the world, you may easily find a gorgeous exotic woman to marry with because their native men don’t want to compete with you.

However, 'another kind of beauty' does not always mean ugliness or unpopularity. If you look at photographs of beautiful nature or landscape, without any doubt, everyone can simply agree with you that they are beautiful pictures. However, unlike natural landscape photographs, Picasso’s paintings which human bodies are distorted can be very famous and valuable.

You all are beautiful; only for some, their beauty is in depth or too modern for people in their countries to understand and accept. They require people who have good eyes and artful skills to perceive and to fall in love with because they are ‘another kind of beauty’.

Cartoon story—"True Beauty"

Ted and Cindy are on their date.

Ted: I can’t make a decision to marry you right now because we have known each other for only a very short time. I don’t want to make a mistake in my marriage.

Cindy: Please darling, I really want to make a family with you so badly. Many men have denied my proposals in the past. I really hope that Ted will be the last, right guy.

Ted: No, I can’t. Seriously, now I can’t marry you. Cindy, please don’t rush me. It is too soon for me to make a decision. Although, you just won a crown of Miss Universe, I want to marry a woman who is beautiful both inside and outside.

Cindy: Look no further, darling. I am beautiful both inside and outside.

Ted: I can’t tell right now would I be really in love with you because I am still unsure about some of your behaviors. Honestly, sometimes I see you have an odd behavior. Moreover, there are many naughty girls live in your neighbor so you might also behave like them. You must show me more inside of you in order to be considered to be my wife. I want to see inside of you! I want to see your heart! I want to see who exactly you are!

Cindy: Okay darling, now look at me. I will show you right now.

Ted: Ahhhh!!!!!!! I can’t marry you! I can’t marry you!

Cindy: What’s wrong, darling! Don’t you think inside of me is beautiful? Or you want me tattoo your name on my stomach? Come down here, darling. Come to kiss my gut.

© 2012, by ½ Lady Lisa. All Rights Reserved.