"A man who requires sex more frequency than other men, should he be called ‘sex addicted’? Does everyone need the same amount of food and water?"

Don’t think you harbor a sexual addiction.

The term ‘sex addiction’—is often used as a cliché. When celebrities, or even you, are exposed for having secret sex with many women, or because you have often hired many sex escorts, society calls these perversions a ‘sexual addictions’. If people term you a—‘sex addict’, don’t be afraid to ask them back—‘how often do you have to have sex that to be called ‘addicted’? And believe me, they don’t know.

What makes you think that you are addicted to sex?

Compared to male shopping habits—where a billionaire spends over $100,000 a month on shopping sprees; and the shopping spree doesn’t cause him any financial problem—who cares? However, a middle class man spends just $1,000 a month; on his limited income, he ends up with a huge amount of credit card debt. When your life devolves into problems/troubles, you begin to figure out which bad habit(s) you have over done that have ruined your life, and then blame it on an ‘addiction’. This can also be the same with your sexual habits—it is pointless to question how often any person should have sex per day, per week or per month. However, the question should be—has being a sex lover/addict ruined a person’s life so badly that he needs to seek sex counseling/rehab? (Like some celebrities and politicians?)

While sex is a necessity to human life, just like eating food—when you feel hungry, that is the sign telling you that your body needs to be fed; when you feel thirsty, that is the sign telling you that you need to drink. Nature creates these signs for us to know what/when we need to satisfy/nourish our bodies. So when you feel horny, that is a sign from your body telling you that you need to cum—to simply have sex—you need to cum to relieve the pressure inside your body.

Without these signals, people wouldn’t know when to eat, drink and cum. How much food/water you need can be determined by nature—our body signals us when we are full/satisfied. It is the same with sex, after ejaculating, your hard-on is gone—that is your body’s signal to tell you that you have had enough sex for now. Some men can immediately cum more than once, (some 3-4-5 times!!) this means that their bodies require sex more than the average guy. However, just as you don’t eat/drink only once and then feel full for the rest of the day, you don’t have sex just once in a while. A growing hard-on is never permanently gone, it comes up constantly for the rest of your life and that means you need to have sex again and again—this doesn’t mean you are addicted.

A man who requires sex more frequency than other men, should he be called ‘sex addicted’? Does everyone need the same amount of food and water? When you first start having sex (it can be at a very young age), you need to cum more often. When we are young kids, we need just small portions of food, then as we grow, we need larger portions. Upon reaching customary marriage age (20’s-30’s), the age nature has set for men to produce offspring, and sex is used as the implement for breeding; nature produces healthy and strong sperm, as sturdy male bodies are ready to breed—how can men have sex less often?

Another reason, many men use sex as ‘stress release’; you have more job responsibility, more family problems to worry about than when you were a teenager—that’s why you need to release stress (cum) more often. Is the increased need for sex such a problem that society needs to term it an “addiction’?—Especially since nature has already prepared for men a method to solve his ‘addicted’? As men age, their sexual drive normally decreases by itself. Many old men have told me that—“When I was a young man, I was able to cum 3-4-5 times a day, but now that I am old, I can’t cum as often as I would like, now only once a while.” Then many of them may have to solve another sexual health problem, their decrease in sexual desire can only be jump-started at their old age by taking male enhancement prescriptions.

I have asked many men, how they would feel if they couldn’t have sex, numerous men told me that they would become moody and would likely end up depressed. How would you feel, when it is lunchtime, but you skip it? You don’t want your stomach growling, your hunger will keep bothering you at work, won’t it?—and that is the reason why you have to stop work and eat, this simply fix allows you to concentrate on your job. Similarly, you choose to have sex when you feel horny rather than trying to control it—because you don’t want the depressed feelings associated with the lack of sex for long period of time, this will also bother you at work. Moreover, by eliminating sex for long periods of time, men can also lose their ability to attain an erection—this can create other problems: how can men who cannot attain an erection satisfy their sexual partners? One sex problem, the addiction, is solved, but another one replaces it immediately.

Don’t think that you are ‘sexually addicted’ until you understand clearly the nature of men’s sex lives. The term ‘sex addict’ which people use as a cliché can make you feel sick. Then when you think you are sick, you will be worried and perhaps become depressed, which can affect both your life, your health and your job. Don’t let this kind of male entertainment (sexual activity) cause you unhappiness—enjoy your life, sex can help you release stress and that means having a healthy mind. Unlike drinking alcohol, smoking and taking drugs, you may want to quit them cold turkey, when they may well ruin your health; these are extrinsic activities you choose to add into your life; you can live without them. Sex, however, is an intrinsic need (just like the need for food and water) which nature includes in all humans to fulfill their body’s needs—you can’t eliminate them; you need to sleep, eat, drink, exercise and have sex—they are repeated all your life; you sleep tonight then tomorrow night you need to sleep again, you eat three meals a day then the next day you eat another three meals and you have sex today then you have to repeat again when your body needs it—your body, not your sex rehab counselor, determines when/how often you need sex. Some men try to over-regulate their sex life because they believe they are sex addicted, until they become depressed, because they are trying to control certain parts of their bodily system and against nature. Just like what would happen, if you stopped eating—you could develop an eating disorder and have no energy for work.

However, just like eating—if you eat too much (even after your body tells you that it is time to stop because you are full), you gain weight and you end up in bad shape, when you feel you have had too much sex and it starts to ruin your life. For example, you might think about sex all the time, until it affects your work, or you may spend so much money hiring sexual escorts that you end up in debt, or even broke. Many men choose to solve their sexual problems by quickly getting married, because they believe that having a sexual partner at home will help to end their over spending on sex. However, based on my experience and numerous interviews with married men, marriage seems to not be the right way to end their sex problems, on the other hand it many times cause more/new problems. At the beginning of a marriage when the couple is in love, they enjoy having sex often which should/could bring on a greater sexual frequency in the early stages of their marriage and becoming familiar with their partner helps them to develop a healthy sex life. Then sometimes during the time when a wife can’t have sex with her husband, such as during maternity, the need for sex becomes the husband’s vice. Moreover, at the beginning of a marriage, just like eating a delicious meal, you enjoy eating so much—over time later, sex with your wife, becomes like eating the same food everyday, marital sex can be boring then dramatically decreasing while your need for sex becomes greater and greater everyday because of your lack of marital sex. The worst thing is—not only can’t you leave your wife, but you need sex so bad that you end spending most of your time and money searching for a new secret partner(s).

You can’t stop having sex, however, even if having too much sex is ruining your life. To solve this problem is just like when you are dieting; you can’t completely stop eating, but you can try to control your diet. You don’t have to stop having sex but figure out how much sex you need to have per day, week or month while you are still in good physical and financial shape, before it ruins your career and finances. Then you put your sexual needs on a calendar, just as you would do with your work schedule and control that golden number. Other simply way to control sexual frequency without spending too much money in rehab:

• Add more vegetable to your diet and less high protein/cholesterol red meat. Based upon my experience, vegetarian men have reduced sexual desires than men who love to eat high protein red meat and few vegetables.
• While being alone in your private room, such as bedroom, whether watching TV or using computer, always leave the door open. Every time you feel lonely and privacy, your sexual fantasies will be sparked.
• Don’t leave your schedule empty. When you know that the following day or upcoming holidays or weekend will contain free time, fill up schedule with activities/hobbies such as playing your favorite sports, biking, etc. Oops—this doesn’t include taking your wife on a shopping spree for the holidays because husbands always feel lonely and bored while waiting for their wives to finish shopping.

Remember—don’t stop having sex, but enjoy it in while you are still in good physical shape. Healthy sperm, a sturdy male body, erections and the desire to have sex are not perpetual. Sexual desires will definitely slow down as you age. Don’t feel upset at older age and blame yourself—‘what the hell did I do when I was a young man—nothing at all? I have wasted my time in the past.’
Enjoy your sex life!

A psychologist hired an escort one day. The escort asked him—‘do you know anything about sexual addictions?’ The psychologist responded that he had read many articles about sex addiction; however, he did not believe that sex addiction was real. This was a fact that the psychologist revealed behind an escort’s bedroom door.

© 2011, by ½ Lady Lisa. All Rights Reserved.